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Old 02-19-2009, 05:45 AM
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Default When Grandma Goes To Court

Oldie, but still funny :grin:

Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if

they aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney

called his first witness, a grand motherly, elderly woman to the stand.

He approached her and asked, 'Mrs.. Jones, do you know me?' She responded,

'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr.. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy,

and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife,

and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs.

You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never

amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across

the room and asked, 'Mrs.. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr.. Bradley since he was a

youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a

normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state.

Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women.

One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and,

in a very quiet voice, said, 'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me,

I'll send you both to the electric chair.'
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Old 02-20-2009, 06:56 AM
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Default Re: When Grandma Goes To Court

small towns are good & bad
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